The story of my bridesmaids and their dresses is a comical one indeed. I don’t know how to pick out clothes for other people. I barely know how to pick out clothes for myself. I wear a different version of a black dress every day of my life. And since my girls weren’t wearing little black dresses, the process of picking out what they would wear went something like this.
Brother – “What kind of dresses do you want the girls to wear?”
Me – “I don’t know, something cute.”
Brother – “You need a dress that is simple so that all the girls will look good in it.”
Me – “OK”
Brother – “What about something like this (holding up a strapless dress in teal from his rack-o-dresses)”
Me – “OK”
And that is how the dresses were chosen. Not very eventful. See, I have this problem. All my friends are way too nice and would never tell me they don’t like something. They just say, “what ever you want, you are the bride.” This seems like a good problem to have, when in fact, it makes me crazy. I never know if in actuality I am “that bride” that is making my girls wear something that they hate and they are secretly cursing me and planning revenge for when they get married.
Believe me, I deserve this revenge.
The first debacle was the shoes. I wear high heels almost every day of my life, so I don’t really have a concept of what kind of shoes normal people wear. So I picked a pair of strappy heels from Nine West and yes, I knew they were 4 inch heels, but aren’t all heels at least 4 inches? Some of the girls were a little worried about the heel and worried about the strappy, but no one would directly tell me that they didn’t like the shoes. I would hear from one girl that another girl was concerned about them, and then would throw in, “don’t tell her I told you”. I was pretty much stuck. My only saving grace was that Nine West has unlimited exchanges online, so they could try different sizes until they found ones that fit and were the most comfortable. Plus, they looked really cute, so once the girls saw them, they like them (so they tell me to my face.) And luckily the shoes ended up going on super sale and running each girl around $30. Thank goodness.
Now for the dresses, let me start by saying, these girls looked gorgeous in these dresses. The process of getting them fitted was not the most ideal. I took the first measurements after a glass of wine during my pom pom party. They weren’t terrible, but some of the girls’ measurements confused my poor designer. He did the best he could to get a first draft ready and brought the dresses down for the girls to try on about 7 weeks before the wedding. (Jessica, Evan’s sister, was not there for the fitting with my brother, more on that later.) I didn’t exactly organize this fitting as if to say, plan it on a calendar and invite people to attend. I just kind of called people the day before and said, “Can you come try on this dress?” When they had free minute one Sunday, they one by one stopped over my Mother’s house to get fitted. We had to take one of the dresses in the backroom of Hats In the Belfry for my girl who couldn’t get off work. He pinned and tucked to make sure every dress fit perfectly, took them to New York for alterations and then shipped them back to my Maryland the week before the wedding. Two dresses still weren’t quite right and had to be shipped overnight back to New York for final alterations. I am sorry to who ever had to work overtime to fix them two days before the wedding.
Rewind to a place in Michigan. Since Jessica couldn’t be at the fitting with my brother, we shipped her dress and told her she could take it to any alterations shop if she needed alterations. The seamstress that ended up working on Jessica’s dress didn’t really know what she was doing (didn’t see our vision) and ended up shortening the dress, significantly. After alterations, it just wasn’t something that Jessica could picture herself wearing. She had a mini-breakdown (because she also happened to be taking exams in accelerated courses at Michigan State) and I told her, she didn’t have to wear the dress. Really it was not worth the stress, since I had no idea what the dress looked like after being chopped by an unknown seamstress. She would be much happier in a dress she could pick out herself.
Side story: I was talking with Evan about this decision to have Jessica pick her own dress. I told him that I know exactly how she must feel. I would get so overwhelmed during College exams that I could barely sleep at night, let alone plan for a family members wedding in a dress that was way too mini. Evan’s response was, “yeah, but Jessica is not like you, she is really smart.”
Day of the wedding, all the girls (including Jessica) tried on the dresses for my brother to see. Turns out, they all looked fantastic! Everyone was excited and happy to put them on and be the most beautiful version of bridesmaids that I have ever seen. That was until; we told everyone that they weren’t allowed to sit down until after the ceremony. Yes, you read that correctly. The first bridesmaid (who happens to be a very skinny girl) sat down and her dress popped open right under the zipper. Oops! Good thing we had an excellent sewer in the room who was able to fix it with not even a hint that it happened. Thus the rule, “no sitting in the dress.”
My girls were absolute troopers. No one complained even the slightest. One of the most memorable moments of the day was the trolley ride to the venue. All the girls (including myself) stood-up and held on for the ride through Detroit. All the guys sat comfortable in their suits except for my brother who stood with us because he was the one who made the rule about sitting (isn’t that sweet). Once at the venue, some girls started to find things to lean on, or asked for help taking the 4 inch heels off until the ceremony started. My brother kept a watchful eye on the girls in the dresses, to make sure no one tried to sneak a seat. After the ceremony, I told all the girls to get themselves a drink at the bar and grab a seat. But by that time they were having too much fun to sit down. I don’t think Jessica sat the whole night and kept the heels on!
I expect that I will be wearing a full Chiquita Banana Fruit Headdress, with a hot pink body suit and Lady Gaga 6 inch platform heels in order to make this up to my girls. I owe them all big time!
When scouting the hotels where we would book our wedding block, a nice restaurant where we could have our rehearsal dinner was one of the criteria we looked for. The Marriott at the Renaissance Center had a ton of wonderful amenities and the beautiful set up at 42 degrees North sealed the deal. The restaurant’s patio overlooked the Detroit River and Canadian skyline. On the day we visited in March the temperature left something to be desired, but the day before our wedding the weather was blue skies and perfect!
When we walked out and saw the set-up, it reminded me of something out of a Top Chef episode. The silver tables were set up banquet style in a long line. At each place setting was the customized menu that I slaved over during my bridal crafting sessions. The beautiful blue sky and matching clear water in the river. The scene was picturesque.
The beautiful view as we ate was just extra to the wonderful company of our friends and family. We were entertained by Michael’s stories about how he used to work on the big cargo boats that cruised up and down the Detroit River. He told us the secret to how you identify what country of origin the boats are from. If they have a Canadian flag, they are Canadian boats and if they have an American flag, they are from the United States. That logic seamed simple to follow until the next boat drove by with both flags waving.
The dinner was a really nice time to welcome and thank all of the people who traveled to be part of our celebration. The thank you gifts we brought for our bridesmaids and groomsmen were wine glasses and beer mugs that were painted with caricatures to look like each person in our bridal party. I found the etsy site, Fizzy Artist, through an update that our day of coordinator sent out. They were a little silly, but definitely a hit.
The final surprise of the night was a little something that my mother-in-law and I had planned. I wanted Evan to have a grooms’ cake and thought it would be nice to do it as a surprise for him at the rehearsal dinner. Evan has always been a big fan of Kid Rock and since we were getting married in Detroit, I thought we could do something with the Kid in his hometown. Evan’s mother had a great idea to put a picture of Evan in an outfit very similar to something the Kid would wear on the cake with a Detroit message, “Ain’t no party like a Detroit party”. So I sent the picture of Evan and she did everything else. She had it made at a store in Evan’s home town, Kalkaska, and had to bring the edible photos with her all the way to Detroit to put them on the cake herself. It was a total surprise.
